Recovering From Recovery

About the book (from the author)

When we talk about recovery from substance abuse, we speak only in extremes. A person is either 100 percent substance free, or they have slipped and failed. Complete abstinence is the only celebrated and therefore the only acceptable measure of success. "Recovering from Recovery" is an exploration of my journey away from the rhetoric and advice I heard in AA, advice designed seemingly to help but which is so couched in shame and judgment that it blocked me from finding and living my truth. It is the story of how sex opened in me the ability to finally begin healing.

I often heard in AA that casual sex was a result of my "disease", but I soon discovered that being drunk had simply allowed me to silence the voices of shame that kept me from exploring my sexuality, indulging in pleasure and intimacy, and embracing my inner, proud slut. In ignoring the sex-negative advice in the rooms of AA and walking away from a way of thinking deeply rooted in cis-male, misogynistic, American fear of sex and intimacy, I began to question everything. As I explored, without chemical enhancement, fetishes, groups, sex parties and other discouraged behavior, I began to uncover and examine what else about this all-or-nothing mentality might not be the best path for me toward personal and sexual freedom.