Dear Mom

My adopted parents told me that a policeman found me on a street corner in Tokyo, Japan, and that I told him I was waiting for my mama to come back to get me. I don't know how long he waited with me on that corner, but I ended up in a Catholic-run orphanage and never saw Mama again. Wonderment (as expected) has been present throughout my life: when I joined the navy and couldn t provide a birth certificate and every time I see a new doctor and they ask about my family medical history. Every year when I legally turn one year older, I wonder when my real birthday is. And exactly where was I born? I think that as with most adopted children, the question that haunts me most is why? Was I such a terrible little boy that neither my mother nor father wanted to put up with me? And knowing how much the Asian culture desires sons, why didn t my parents want me anymore? Was it because I was so small they figured I wouldn t be of much help on the farm, and I would only be another mouth to feed? My adopted mother told me that my dialect was that of someone who lived in the country, probably on a farm. I ve probably seen too many movies, but to this day, I can picture Mama putting up a good front while taking me into the city, finding a busy street where no one would notice what she was doing, then telling me to be a good boy and that she would be back to get me. And as she turned away, walking slowly at first so as not to create a scene or possibly having a change of heart but then running and weeping harder and harder, the farther she got from me. As I journey through the last half of my life, I would like to know if I have any siblings or relatives that I can someday arrange to meet. I hope that my mom is still alive, and I hope that she s wondered about the son she left on that street corner. If not, in a way, this is probably just as much for me as it is for her. I wonder if Mom ever went back to that corner and replayed those memories in her head or if she avoids it at all cost. I think I turned out a pretty good person, so I want to let my mom know the person I turned out to be and my journey getting here. This is the story of my life to my mom.