The Rules of Government: Machiavelli Updated: Secret Rules of the Bureaucrats and Politicians

When Machiavelli pioneered the field of political science he only dealt with princes and small kingdoms. Democracy was a distant Greek memory. Socialism, Communism and unionized civil servants had not been invented. The number of laws and regulations was limited to the number people could write with quill pen and ink. Civil servants were dependent on the monarch and the Independent Village of the Bureaucrats did not exist. The idea of Computers and the Internet was beyond magic.

Since then, bloodthirsty knights in shining armor have been replaced by bloodthirsty bureaucrats in tailored suits. In Machiavelli's day wealth and power came from owning land and controlling trade routes. Today's bureaucrats derive wealth and power from budgets line items and growth comes from failure.

Things have changed. Machiavelli needs to be updated.

When dealing with the government, remember:

• Rule 1: To a bureaucrat failure is a growth opportunity.
• Rule 3: Time means nothing to the government. Take a number and line up.
• Rule 11: Someday everything you do will be illegal.
• Rule 20: There is such a thing as a Crook-friendly law.
• Rule 39: Pseudobureaucrat is a new field of employment.
• Rule 54: Bureaucrats are funded by politicians and to a bureaucrat the politician is their customer. When you walk into a government office, you are not a customer.
• Rule 92: Politics is organized revenge.
• Rule 101: Secrets never are and why there isn't a alien spaceship hidden in a secret hiding place.