If Someone You Love Makes You Act Out Of Guilt, It's Not A Good Sign - Here's What To Do

"I'm old and sick, and I'll get a heart attack and die if you won't do what I want."

"You're a worthless husband who can't even buy his wife a new iPhone. Oh wait. You simply don't love me, right?"

"I nearly died while giving birth to you. Now, be grateful and do what I say"

Have you heard anything like this from your parents or romantic partners?

This is emotional blackmail. And it's just as bad as the name implies.

Emotional blackmail is a manipulation technique that's meant to control your actions by tapping into strong emotions such as guilt, obligation, and fear.

It may appear innocent, but in fact it's a huge red flag. If you give in once or twice, the blackmailer's demands will become more and more outrageous. For example, they may skillfully isolate you from your social circle or force you to give up things that bring you joy. If they do it slowly enough, you won't even notice that you're being cut off from your support network and basically held hostage

Why do emotional blackmailers try to manipulate you with fear, obligation, and guilt?

First of all, because it's such an effective manipulation technique If done skillfully, it can put you under their absolute control.

However, not all emotional blackmailers are inherently evil - some people just don't know how to talk about their wants and needs in a direct way. Others have a personality disorder that makes them think blackmailing is an acceptable behavior. Of course, this doesn't mean you should tolerate it

This book, written by acclaimed psychologist Emory Green, will help you understand your unique situation and find smart ways to deal with it.

With this book, you will:

Understand why your blackmailer is behaving in this way
Deal with emotional blackmailing in your family
Recognize a manipulative romantic partner before they get hold of you
Set personal boundaries and protect them
Communicate in an assertive, non-defensive manner
Build the mental toughness necessary to resist manipulation
Realize if YOU are emotionally blackmailing someone - and STOP doing it

Dealing with emotional blackmail can be very challenging. Emotional blackmail usually comes from the people we love most, such as parents and romantic partners, and it can be very painful to realize that they've been manipulating you for years.

Sometimes, if the blackmailer won't change their behavior, you have no other choice but to terminate the relationship - and this can be an extremely difficult decision, especially if you have to cut a parent out of your life. But remember that you're doing this to save yourself - you're not a bad son or daughter

This book will give you the courage to listen to your intuition, confront your abusers, and make hard decisions if necessary.

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Masters of Emotional Blackmail - inbunden, Engelska, 2020